To Be Real, Allow Your Feet To Be Washed
It was high school confirmation class (1988) and she hadn’t washed her feet. Not in a while. Of course, the only reason we knew that was because the dear couple who volunteered to teach our class decided to have us take off a shoe so they could wash our feet, one by one, as they mimicked Jesus washing the feet of his disciples in the Gospel of John (13:1-18). The poor girl with the dirty feet and socks was horrified. I think her name was Heather. She couldn’t hide the fact that her feet and socks were filthy. Red in the face, Heather waited as our teachers bent down and washed our feet, one at a time. I was taken aback at their hands-on approach with a bunch of teens who would rather be anywhere but there. I don’t think any of us really chose to attend CCD. But this girl! She wanted to crawl into a hole. We were all so thankful that our feet were clean enough. Yet, this couple didn’t seem to mind at all. They cleaned her foot and the water became murky. With gentle humor, they dabbed her wet foot with the towel and set it down. She would never forget it. I doubt that any of us would.
And the couple read, as they circled the room with the bowl of water and towel, “Now before the festival of the Passover, Jesus knew that his hour had come to depart from this world and go to the Father. Having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end. The devil had already put it into the heart of Judas son of Simon Iscariot to betray him. And during supper Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into his hands, and that he had come from God and was going to God, got up from the table, took off his outer robe, and tied a towel around himself. Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and to wipe them with the towel that was tied around him. He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, ‘Lord, are you going to wash my feet?’ Jesus answered, ‘You do not know now what I am doing, but later you will understand.’ Peter said to him, ‘You will never wash my feet.’ Jesus answered, ‘Unless I wash you, you have no share with me.’ Simon Peter said to him, ‘Lord, not my feet only but also my hands and my head!’ Jesus said to him, ‘One who has bathed does not need to wash, except for the feet, but is entirely clean. And you are clean, though not all of you.’ For he knew who was to betray him….After he had washed their feet, had put on his robe, and had returned to the table, he said to them, ‘Do you know what I have done to you? You call me Teacher and Lord–and you are right, for that is what I am. So if I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. For I have set you an example, that you also should do as I have done for you. Very truly, I tell you, servants are not greater than their master, nor are messengers greater than the one who sent them. If you know these things, you are blessed if you do them.” (John 13:1-17, bold emphasis my own)
Doing the very thing reserved for the servants in a household, Jesus washed the disciples’ feet before the Passover meal. And their feet, like Heather’s, were dirty from the dusty, unpaved road. Would I have reacted like Simon Peter, who refused to imagine the new paradigm Jesus was creating as he acted against the norm? I think I would have definitely hesitated, if not protested. Yet, Jesus explains that we must allow it if we are to be one of his own, beloved, baptized and chosen disciples. In that moment, Simon Peter did not realize the connection between this footwashing, one’s baptism and the death of Jesus. Paul’s Letter to the Romans (6:3-4) states, “Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? Therefore, we have been buried with him by baptism into death, so that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, so we too might walk in newness of life.” So, when Jesus tells Simon Peter that he needs to allow Jesus to wash Simon Peter’s feet, Jesus is saying that it is connected with Simon Peter’s baptism and with what is to come, namely Jesus’ death and resurrection. As disciples of Jesus, the footwashing leads us to share in this Paschal Mystery–the life, death and resurrection of Jesus.
And there’s more! Jesus is teaching his disciples (and us) that with his knowledge of what is to come, he is impelled into action. “The recipients of the footwashing, a symbolic action that reveals Jesus’ limitless love for his own, are ignorant disciples, one of whom he knows will betray him” (Sacra Pagina:The Gospel of John, p 375). Even with his knowledge of misunderstandings, assumptions and betrayal, Jesus washes their feet. It is an “act of debasement” and Jesus believes that they would (we will) be made new, be forgiven and come to understand what it means to be a disciple of Christ.*
We are called, as Jesus’ disciples, to continue to wash the feet of our fellow humans, even when there is misunderstanding, even when there is discord and especially when being a servant of others stops people in their tracks. In a homily given on Holy Thursday in 2019 at the Velletri Correctional Facility in Rome, Pope Francis said, “This is Jesus’ rule and the rule of the Gospel: the rule of service, not of dominating, of doing harm, of humiliating others. Service! Once, when the Apostles were arguing amongst themselves, they were debating ‘which of us is the greatest,’ Jesus took a child and said: ‘The child. If your heart is not a childlike heart, you will not be my disciples.’ A childlike heart, simple, humble but a servant….Whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be a slave.’” It is also important to note that, in first century Palestine, children were not revered or cherished as they are in our western world today. A child’s status was no more than a slave’s. Therefore, when Jesus made an example of a child's innocence and lack of status, he was saying that we must set aside our status and ego in order to be servants for others. This was unheard of in Jesus’ world, just as it is in ours!
Who is Serving Who?
It is so hard, though, so humiliating to consent to someone else taking the form of a servant in order to help me. It is more difficult to allow that than to offer to help someone else. People in the healthcare field normally do not hesitate to serve others, especially over the past two years on the front lines of serving those sick with COVID-19. It is the healthcare worker who washes their feet day in and day out. They don’t think twice. They simply do the work in loving service for the least among them.
Then I think of my siblings who do so much for my father, while he’s chosen the path of living alone at 89, making it more challenging to ensure he receives the care that he needs for a good life. Yet, my siblings call unfailingly, visit him across many miles and states and do their best to love and honor him. They sort his medicines, finances, food as best they can, limited by what he allows them to do. They look past his mistakes, past hurts, past frustration with patience and tenderness. They wash his feet, even when he doesn’t realize or acknowledge their sacrifices.
The Corporal Works of Mercy, such as feeding the hungry, giving drink to the thirsty, sheltering the homeless, visiting the sick, visiting the prisoners, burying the dead, and giving alms to the poor, all include very real, concrete actions we can take to wash the feet of others. And not only serving others in these ways, we can be present, taking time to listen, laugh and share in their lives.
Jesus calls us to do this, to wash each other’s feet with humility and love – even when we face someone who will soon betray us. Yes, he washed even Judas’ feet. Knowing that he would be denied by his disciples, his friends with whom he had shared the past three years teaching, traveling and reclining with at dinner. Jesus, with full knowledge that he would take the next steps while desperately alone as he surrendered to the Jewish as well as the Roman authorities, knelt down to wash their feet anyway. All the while, he faced an impending final humiliation, beyond the scope of washing feet in the coming days.
Do I Allow Others to Wash My Feet?
We wash the feet of others, but we must also allow others to wash our feet, no matter how filthy or ragged they may be. To what extent do I let the people in my life wash my feet? How selective am I in letting Christ work through others to enrich my life? How many people really know me as I am? The last two questions take us beyond the expected to where we allow others to encounter our true selves, as we reveal our vulnerable side.
While on bedrest In my last weeks of pregnancy with twins and then continuing into their first year of life, I was unable to deny the help that others offered me on a daily basis. It was sometimes humiliating because my weaknesses were revealed on full display. From a dirty home and the inability to stay on top of things because of lack of sleep, I was not myself. I will never forget a surprise visit from friends as I stood there, unshowered in my fluffy robe and dirty kitchen, I had just put the babies down for a nap when the doorbell rang. Surprise! After what seemed like an hour of niceties, my friends left and I stood there and looked around at the mess and wondered how it came to this. Embarrassment does not seem a strong enough word to describe how I felt.
When I offer to help a friend, I often hear, “No, I’m good.” “That’s okay, I got it.” “Thanks anyway.” And how many times have I similarly responded to friends who offer to help me? Is it that we don’t want to come across as unable to do something or that we don’t want to show weakness at all? The attitude seems to be: I can help you, but I never need anyone else’s help. I think that Jesus is saying that, in order to truly be a servant for others, we need to allow others to serve us, too. Because if I can’t receive the gift you offer me, or that God is wanting to give to me through you, then I am denying my and your humanity.
There is a hymn called “The Servant Song” which has powerful lyrics that describe this notion of not just serving others with the love of Christ, but allowing others to serve us in the same way. The song was written by Richard Gallard (England, 1978). Played at our wedding, this song reminds Doug and me that by serving each other daily, we will continue to grow in Christ’s love. Here is the first and last stanza:
Will you let me be your servant
Let me be as Christ to you
Pray that I may have the grace
To let you be my servant too
There is a humility and awareness needed in our relationships and our encounters with others that allows God’s grace to transform our hearts. Unless we humbly receive this love (in whatever form of service it may be) we can only grow so far.
Wisdom of The Velveteen Rabbit
One of my favorite childhood stories is The Velveteen Rabbit written 100 years ago by Margery Williams (1922). A young boy receives a stuffed rabbit made of velveteen, but neglects it for other toys. In the nursery, the Rabbit befriends the old and worn Skin Horse and learns what it means to become real. The Rabbit longs to be real and he gets his wish when the boy begins to play with him and sleep with him at night. Not long after, the boy gets sick with scarlet fever and his toys are gathered up to be discarded, including the Rabbit. The Rabbit, though, ends up discovering the meaning of becoming real because of the love of the little boy. In this dialogue, the Skin Horse is describing to the Rabbit how this happens.
The stuffed Rabbit asks the wise Skin Horse, “What is real?”
“Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin Horse. “It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.”
“Does it hurt?” asked the Rabbit.
“Sometimes,” said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. “When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.”
“Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,” he asked, “or bit by bit?”
“It doesn’t happen all at once,” said the Skin Horse. “You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”
Through the love of the Boy, the Rabbit is transformed. It’s possible that, when we take Jesus’ action of washing his disciples’ feet to heart, and we strive to do the same for others and we also allow them to serve us, that we become more real to others just as they become more real to us. Over time, we become the people God created us to be. These encounters of loving service can and will transform us as disciples of Christ.
As you experience the holiest of weeks, the Triduum from Holy Thursday to Resurrection Sunday, may you walk with Jesus as he loves his disciples, takes up his cross and dies a slaves’ death. May the suffering of Good Friday bring you to new life and a realization of the infinite love that has no limit and no boundaries. May you allow the love of Christ to make you real as you face life as a new creation, dirty feet and all.
Song for Contemplation: “The Servant Song,” written by Richard Gallard.
Blog Notes:
*Raymond E. Brown, S.S., renowned biblical scholar, wrote many interesting and understandable books on scripture. He wrote for both everyday people and for scholars. This quote comes from An Introduction to the New Testament, Doubleday, New York 1997, p. 351
